Keeping it real. Here is how things just went for the last 2 or so hours at our house.
(TMO is hubby's blog nickname. He calls himself The Mundane One in a house full of adhd)
This stuff really drains my mental energy.
After everyone calmed down we had a family meeting to look at how we could have prevented the meltdown in the first place and made suggestions to each other on how get better at this stuff.
1.TMO was tired and hungry and stressed out
2.14 was upset and had anxiety about the phone and so was too fast to be defensive when TMO spoke to her
3.He didn't heed my suggestions for more patience in the situation to notice her anxiety and not respond to her snapping back at him and crying.
4.He saw my intervention as telling him how to parent and taking her side
5.Everyone was feeding off of everyone else's stress and didn't step back to take a breath.
6. TMO was feeling stressed because he felt that people take his comp tech abilities for granted
7. better communication is needed so we know how hard he works on stuff so we don't just see it fixed without him explaining what he goes through to fix things.
Now everyone is playing a video game to "reboot the mood" of the house and I'm trying to gain back some mental energy to concentrate on what I should be doing (laundry and bed sheet changes & planning our week)
I hate when this stuff happens. Especially when I can see is coming and trying to defuse it doesn't work.
The important thing though...is we talked about it after the fact. When meltdowns and tempers subsided. 2 years ago that alone would have been 2 hours.
TMO got to express how he feels under appreciated as the only non in the house and we established that we can't know how hard he works at the comp techie stuff he does if he never tells us. Everyone made jokes and typical "us" stuff caused side tracking that lightened the mood and we are now going about our day...
I just need a little more time to balance out the adrenalin burst that is making me scattered currently.